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Writer's pictureStacie Ysidro

Get in the mood for pleasure: How to increase libido and desire, naturally!

Are you looking for a natural way to increase libido and desire?

Personally, I have found as I'm getting older my responsibilities and biology have shifted. My focus on pleasure can get deprioritized leaving no energy or even desire towards sex and pleasure.


The stress of daily life can create disconnection with my inner sensuality and confidence. I hate feeling like sex is a chore or something to be checked off the to do list.


Oftentimes it isn't even about the physical aspects of sex, it's more about the feeling of connection with myself, my partner and to something greater than me that I really crave.


I have also found my sexual experiences to be the deepest and most powerful even transformational and spiritual ways of embodying this connection.


In this blog post I will give you a few ways to increase your libido and desire that have continued to help me throughout all the stages of my life.


The only guaranteed state change is through breathing. movements, sounds and sensations.

It's 100% natural and totally free! That's right you can do these things at zero cost or

you can dive deeper and invest in yourself with some additional recommendations provided.


Movements and Sounds

I often talk about intuitive movement and sound for moving energy processing emotions and self-expression. Now we're going to chat about structured movements and music.


Dance and music have often helped me shift my mood and extend the duration of an experience. Feeling the rhythm, hearing the words, my breathing naturally shifts and my body starts to pulsate.


Specific tones and musical genres produce certain feelings, images, thoughts and body sensations. For people that have experience with dance and music, I imagine you can relate.


However there are many people who are not as deeply connected to dance, music and movement. This disconnection to the body and self compartmentalization is understandable considering much of the world tries to limit our self expression and demonize what brings us pleasure and personal empowerment.


There are many types of dance and music that can be helpful to ignite your desire and connect with your own sensuality.

Having some structure, a few go- to movements and songs can be helpful to unlocking your own flow.


Here are a few helpful ways to increase your libido and desire using movement and sounds


  • Begin with awareness, listen to different types of music and songs. Notice what happens in your body, how you breathe, how movement appears, what emotions, thoughts and images arise.

  • Make a list of the songs that you automatically associate with feeling sensual, sexy or romantic.

  • Find new music! If you have a favorite song that gets you in the mood, many listening platforms have an option where you can find more songs like those! On Spotify I often click the ‘artist radio’ option or the ‘song radio’ option. It suggests other songs and artists that are similar to the one that I like.

  • Create different playlists! I have a playlist that helps me regulate and release stress in a calm soothing way. I also have a playlist that is more energy building with songs that help me relieve stress in a more physical embodied way. For example a gym playlist, motivation playlist or a dance playlist

  • Utilize the Erotic Blueprints (™). Make your own blueprintified playlist. Check out our Spotify for examples of our blueprint playlists. Whether you're starting with one song or a playlist, spend some time with yourself listening to those songs and allowing your body to move.

  • Find clothing and accessory items that help you embody the vibe and energy of that music.

  • Bonus if you create a self-pleasure practice with one of your favorite songs. Your self-pleasure practice doesn't have to be explicitly sexual and it can be. This is about tuning into yourself and what feels pleasurable in the moment doing that and seeing what appears next

  • Consider watching different types of dance and movement practices. Notice thoughts, images, emotions and body sensations that appear. What do you find most desirable?


Increased desire

What culture and society finds desirable has shifted and changed over time. Presently, scanning the internet you can see that no matter what body type you have somebody finds it desirable!


I've also discovered that I have experienced arousal and desire from different body types. My learning from that experience is that physical appearance is only part of the puzzle!


We all have different perspectives and body abilities. Maybe there is something you really enjoy watching versus doing? Witnessing is also participating. Desire looks different in each moment and shifts and changes over time according to our environment beliefs and values.


Allow yourself permission to have a growth mindset. Consider what is possible when we consider different perspectives, shift beliefs and values that are no longer in alignment with who we are today.


Exploring the Erotic Blueprints can help you understand different ways people interpret arousal and desire, clarify what you desire and find language to communicate your desire with your partner.


How can you find ways to adapt the movement to your abilities? Finding a dance teacher can help you safely adapt movement for your body type and ability. Connect with the feeling and imagine sensation and imagine ways to get the same feeling that work for your abilities.


Invitation

One of the most powerful types of dance for connecting with your sensuality is the art of burlesque dancing.

While often misunderstood, burlesque is not merely about stripping away layers of clothing; it's a powerful pathway for self-expression, empowerment, and amping up your libido!


Increase libido with Burlesque classes!

Burlesque dancing embodies the practices listed above and puts them into action in daily life.

In the world of burlesque, every BODY is celebrated.


Breaking Stereotypes:

Burlesque challenges stereotypes and breaks free from societal constraints. It's a powerful way to redefine femininity and gender roles, and it offers a platform to express your true self.

Confidence Boost: Burlesque encourages you to embrace your sensuality and authenticity. As you learn to be more authentic with yourself you will automatically set the tone and captivate your audience with your essence. Being witnessed in your authenticity brings a newfound sense of self-assuredness that can spill over into your everyday life.


Body positivity: Burlesque classes are an inclusive environment that teaches you to love and appreciate your body, regardless of societal norms. It's a safe space where all shapes and sizes are not only accepted but celebrated! Celebrated burlesque performers can be found in all shapes, sizes, and ethnicities.


Empowerment

Reclaiming our bodies and narratives through this type of practice allows us to embrace our desire and sensuality on our own terms, regaining control and ownership of our body and sexuality. No one can take away your connection to yourself.


Self-Expression: Burlesque dancing is an art form that encourages you to express your unique self without judgment. Through easy choreography, personalized costumes, and alluring movements, you can communicate your individuality and let your inner desires shine privately or for an audience.


Connecting with Pleasure: Burlesque invites you to explore and indulge in pleasure and sensually, physically, mentally and emotionally. You become more in tune with what brings you arousal, joy and satisfaction.

As you connect with your body's sensations and movements you will learn to convey your sensuality and desire through dance.


Community:

All of this is great practice on your own and magic happens when we are in community.

In order to create lasting change and evolve we must have a community around us that is supportive on our path. Creating an opportunity to be supported and offer our magic to others. The burlesque community is often described as a close-knit and supportive one. It's a place where you can connect with like-minded individuals.


Practice the art of tease burlesque dance flyer
Practice the art of Tease with Lilabell

At St Pete Retreat we are grateful to have Lilabell Quaintrelle, a celebrated member of the burlesque community with multiple

Best of The Bay 2024 nominations, offering monthly burlesque classes in St Pete!



Every blueprint type can get creative and play in the world of burlesque dance.

  • Energetic types enjoy the tease!

  • Sensual types can immerse themselves in the music and costumes.

  • Sexual types may especially enjoy watching the show since they do so well with visual stimulation. They may also like getting up and doing the movements for their partners!

  • Kinky types can really get creative here embodying different parts of their kinks to be witnessed!


Overall I would say burlesque dance is a shapeshifter experience! Using your intuition, listening to your body and perhaps taking a few classes, you can create whatever you want!


In conclusion, there are many ways to increase libido and desire. The solution is finding what works best for you through having a growth mindset, reflect, listen to the wisdom of your body and stay curious.


By trying the strategies outlined in this article - from mindful breathing and movement to exploring burlesque dancing - you will reconnect with your sensuality and desire. The power of music, dance, and self-expression serves as a gateway to not only enhance our sexual experiences but also to build deeper connections with ourselves and our partners, from the bedroom to the boardroom. Hope to see you at dance class!


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